Not to give too big a peek behind the curtain, but this list was by far the most fun to assemble. Our panel consisted of such luminaries as Johnny Knoxville; Howard Stern; Ozzy Osbourne; Elvira; Princess Patty Potty, the poop-eating princess; and John Waters, among other members of the bizarre, burlesque underworld. What made this so fun is that several of the finalist entries were achieved during the voting process itself! We won't divulge who ate what, but we will offer this challenge: If you don't like what you see here, go eat something worse!

25. A pair of Groucho glasses (11)
24. Del Taco's Macho 3-pound burrito-unchewed! (12)
23. See "The 20 Worst Tasting Candies." (12)
22. A complete set of Monopoly tokens: the hat, the boot, the iron, etc. (13)
21. Gum swallowed seven years ago (14)
20. Jessica Hahn (14)
19. Someone else's vomit (15)
18. A baby crocodile (16)
17. A roll of duct tape (16)
16. The Rich (16)
15. A videotape of Lethal Weapon III (18)
14. A Scotch-brite® dish sponge, still in the wrapper (19)
13. A complete set of Wacky Packs (20)
12. Mrs. Weatherford's Pickle Surprise Meatloaf (20)
11. Phil (20)
10. A pair of Armani leather shoes (24)
9. Canine semen (25)
8. A vortex to another dimension (28)
7. Complete chapters of Laura Ingalls Wilder's Little House on the Prairie (32)
6. A whole great white shark (35)
5. Jimmy Hoffa (35)
4. A living, thriving watermelon vine (47)
3. A license plate (60)
2. Wax lips (60)
1. Another human stomach (92)

The winning entry got votes by over 82% of our panelists-and nobody had to actually recreate this one on the spot, either. Mr. Thom E. Beans, panel spokesperson offered this statement about the list: "We know that we've left out many, many bizarre things that have made their way through at least part of the human digestive tract. But as always, true art is more than just the doing, it's also the publicity."

What else did we find in there? A song that was supposed to be in the heart, A top hat and fake beard, Fifty feet of copper wire, An entire automobile in tiny pieces, Barrettes, Fortune cookie fortunes, A scalpel, Baby aliens, Partially digested food, An "I [Heart] NY" bumper sticker, The bitten-off end of a spoon, A whale, A human head-intact, Hydrosulfuric acid, Light bulbs, A tapeworm, Eye of newt, toe of frog, Fat, A carburetor, Butterflies, The wrong kind of acid, Car keys, Scrabble tiles, Spare change, and a coral reef complete with manta rays!

Back to the Best Lists of the Millennium


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©2001 by Randy Shandis Enterprises. Questions or Comments?