The 25 Best Religions to the New Millennium

Besides being one of the biggest fads of the last Millennium, religions offered a little something for everyone. While Time Magazine and Newsweek are too scared to tell people that some relgions are better than others, our panel of intellectuals had no qualms. How did your belief system rank?

25. Lutherans (20)-They probably would have ranked higher, but no Lutherans sent us any promotional material.
24. Scientology (27)
23. Consumerism (30)
22. Islam (37)
21. The Gospel Yeh-Yeh (39)
20. Eclecticism (40)
19. New Age Pagan Freakout (40)
18. The Rave Scene (45)
17. Unitarian (45)
16. Egoism (50)
15. Artemis Death Cult (50)
14. First Church of the Last Laugh (60)
13. Satanism (65)
12. The Voice of Don Pardo (70)
11. First Church of John Coltrane (75)
10. Catholicism (78)
9. The Voice of Hu (84)-Hu? Hu!
8. Episcopalian (87) Catholicism Lite!
7. Zen Buddhism (164) Buddha just looks so relaxed.
6. Pantheism (100)
5. Hinduism (103)
4. Judaism (172)
3. Agnosticism (200)
2. Atheism (200)
1. The Causey Way (304 points) - Whenever we're confused or alone, we ask ourselves, "What Would Causey Do?" The answer is always, "Rock on!" Look out in the next millennium for this up and coming, go-getting religion. The Causey Way Is Not a Cult!

Other Things We Might Kneel For: Greek Mythology, Beach Worship, Beatlemania, Baal Worship, Alcoholism, The 25-cent Church of Elvis, Bahai, Baptists (Leisure suits rule!), Fanaticism, Creationism, Conservatism, Republicanism and Beach Baal Worship.

On to Other Lists


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